Did you lose touch with your college friends after graduation?
You are absolutely not alone here. This is a very common problem for a lot of college graduates.
But don’t worry: I got you covered.
Here are 5 tips how to keep in touch with your college friends:
Let’s get to it.
Tip 1: Remember their Birthday
This one is actually pretty obvious but powerful nonetheless: Remember the birthday of your college friends.
We have a simple calendar in our kitchen where we write down the birthdays of our friends and family. Every time I go past it, I look if it’s someone’s birthday today, or if I missed a birthday the last days. Then I call him or her or write a small text message.
It’s not much, but think about how you feel when someone from your past remembers your birthday. I’m always amazed if a school friend I haven’t spoken to in a couple of years still remembers my birthday.
And often the birthday wishes rekindle a conversation.
If an old-school analogue calendar isn’t your thing, use the calendar in your phone to remind you of your friends’ birthdays.
Tip 2: Find an activity to do together
I lost contact with one friend from med school after we graduated, and both worked a lot in our first years of our residency.
Then somehow, we met at a party, got into a conversation and realized we both are very much into cycling.
We agreed to go for a bike ride the next week after work. After the ride, we had a beer and Chinese take-away food at his place.
This was the start of us going for a bike ride at least once per week that summer. It rekindled our friendship because we found an activity that we both enjoyed doing together.
With another friend from med school who lives an hour away, I still meet on weekends to go cycling together.
Especially for us men, it’s easier to maintain a friendship over shared activities, especially sports, than just going for a walk or hanging out.
So think about what you can do with your friends from college. Maybe you and one of your friends are both into photography. So go out for a photo walk together. Or perhaps you and another friend are into the same kind of music. Then plan a trip to a local concert.
Mutual activities lead to shared experiences and stories which make it easier to connect over text messages, video calls or telephone calls if you can’t meet in person.
Tip 3: Use College traditions
My school has a huge football (or soccer for you Americans) tournament at the last weekend before Christmas where all graduation classes down to 1980 or something compete with an own team.
I always look forward to this weekend because it’s a perfect way to catch up with my friends from school. Playing football with your old schoolmates is a great way to catch up through a common goal of not getting injured (we dismissed winning as our goal a long time ago).
But also for the people who are not playing, it’s a great excuse to return to their hometown, watch some bad football and catch up with their classmates while supporting their team.
Maybe your college has such a tradition too.
Maybe it’s a special game of your college sports team against their arch rivals? Or perhaps your college has a traditional summer party or another special day when many alumni come back to campus. These events are perfect to keep in touch with your friends from college.
You can plan a trip to your college town together, stay together and visit the event together.
As these are regular events, you can meet your friends regularly and your friends group can create your own traditions coupled to these events.
Tip 4: Start a personal Newsletter
What about if you can’t meet regularly with your college friends?
How about starting your own private newsletter?
It’s a great way to keep your friends from college updated on what’s going on in your life. Just write a weekly email every Sunday where you recap your week and share some thoughts and memories with your friends. I’m sure this will spark conversations with your friends because you are all in the same phase of your life and share some of your problems, events, and thoughts. That’s always a great conversation starter.
And please — don’t overcomplicate it. Just ask your friends if they want to be included and start a Gmail thread. There is really no need to use a dedicated newsletter software like ~Beehive~ or ~Substack~.
Just use your Gmail account to write your personal newsletter.
Tip 5: Watch a Netflix Show Together
How about watching a Netflix show “together”? I bet you have this one friend which whom you share your taste for Netflix shows. So, make sure to watch the next show you both want to watch together.
There is a service called free service ~Teleparty~ that enables you to synchronize your Netflix watching even if you both watch it on your own laptop or TV.
Or just watch the episodes separately in a rhythm you both agreed upon beforehand and share your thoughts with each other after each episode.
Bonus Tip: Have a reminder to contact a (random) friend
But maybe you know exactly what to do and talk about with your friends from college, but you just forget to text them in your hectic everyday life.
I feel you.
That’s why I built a simple little web app called ~dailyreconnect.com~ that sends me the name of a random friend via email every morning. This reminds me to contact this friend. Just this morning I texted the friend that I got from ~dailyreconnect.com~, and he called me back 30 minutes later, and we had a nice chat about this and that.
Do you want to try ~dailyreconnect.com?~ Currently, it’s invite only, but don’t worry.
Just write me an email (Marius [at] ~dailyreconnect.com~) and I will sign you up. It’s currently $20 paid once for lifetime access.